A Boncuk update …

Posted on November 6, 2017 by livingtheturkishdream

It’s been a long time since I last did an update on Boncuk on my blog, and since it was 5 years ago last week that we found her, I thought now would be the perfect time!

As you know, Boncuk now lives with Berkay’s family on their farm in the village. We went to spend a few days with them in April, and again in September, so I’ve seen her twice this year. Although we don’t get to see her very often, she definitely has not forgotten us and still greets us with an excited waggy tail every time she sees us. The few days we spent with her in April she was very clingy to me and would sit outside the gate waiting for a glimpse of us when we were inside the house. She followed me everywhere when I was walking around the farm, it was so cute. She wouldn’t even let us drive off in the car without trying to jump in.. and one day we gave in and let her come for a little trip up one of the mountains – she laid on my lap, head on my arm, face looking out of the window, ears flapping in the wind. Then when we got out of the car and went for a walk it was just like old times, when we used to take her on lots of walks around Fethiye and Calis. Bless her. Leaving her in April broke my heart, I bawled my eyes out knowing she’d wonder where we’d gone again. I hope she doesn’t think we abandon her over and over again. Someone told me dogs have no sense of time and I hope that’s true, I hate to think of her waiting for us and wondering when we’ll be back.

In September we went to visit again for a couple of days and she was her usual, cute self. Greeting us with a waggy tail and big smiley face. I was also really amazed that she still knows the ‘tricks’ we taught her – ‘sit’, ‘lay’ & ‘paw’! One night I was searching for her for ages, calling her name, trying to find her around the farm, under the cars, in the hay shed, but she was nowhere to be seen. After a while, Berkay found her asleep, curled up in a ball under the sofa on the terrace. So sneaky!

She really is the sweetest dog I’ve ever known. I was worried when we first took her to the village that maybe she’d lose her loving, soft temperament since she’d have less human interaction. Turkish people don’t really look at pets the same way we do, no baby talk to the dogs, minimal fussing and stroking and definitely no cuddles on laps like she used to have with us… they have their own dog who is chained up all day and is very much a guard dog, who wouldn’t think twice about chewing your arm off! Boncuk has kept her loving personality though, she’s still timid and never growls at anyone, all she’d do is lick you to death! She’s a bit of a wimp to be honest! Although she’s not allowed indoors, apparently whenever it’s thunder and lightning she runs in and jumps on the sofa if she spots the front door open!

It’s so hard leaving her but I know she’s well looked after in the village. Berkay’s brother loves her and she likes her life there. She loves to roam free around the farm and plays with the lambs and lets the little chicks run all over her. She plays with their other dog and follows Berkay’s step-mum around on her farm duties! Sometimes I feel really bad for her, wondering if she misses the old days, when we’d take her for walks along Calis beach, playing fetch in fields and up on the hills overlooking the sea.. she used to love playing fetch with her ball and now she doesn’t even have any toys… but I hope she doesn’t miss it.

People often ask why we don’t bring her to England and I would love to, the money isn’t an issue I would happily pay it, but she wouldn’t like it here. We both work all day 5 days a week, so she’d be on her own in our flat (with no garden) for 9 hours a day and that’s just not nice for her. She’s never been an indoor dog, she only knows life outside, so she’d hate being cooped up indoors alone all day, it wouldn’t be fair on her.

We’re lucky she can stay with Berkay’s family and we can still go and visit her – it certainly makes visiting the village more bearable for me. When I get too stressed or overwhelmed with village life I just take myself off outside, call for Boncuk and sit having a little chat with her.

I can’t believe it was 5 years ago we found her as a teeny tiny puppy!
❤

What is Kurban Bayram?

Posted on August 30, 2017 by livingtheturkishdream

Kurban Bayram will be celebrated tomorrow, but what does this mean, and how will it affect your holiday to Turkey?

Bayram literally means festival, or holiday, and is used to describe national and religious holidays in Turkey. There are two main religious (Islamic) holidays, one being Seker Bayram (celebrated after Ramadan), and the other being Kurban bayram, which is celebrated this week. In the UK this is known as Ed-al-Adha.

Kurban Bayram is the festival of the sacrifice, where millions of people sacrifice an animal to commemorate the Islamic prophet Ibrahim’s willingness to sacrifice his son as an act of obedience to God. Animals such as cows, goats and most often, sheep, are sacrificed. Once sacrificed, the meat is shared out, some is given to the poor, some is kept for the family, and some is given to other relatives, friends and neighbours. Of course Kurban Bayram/Eid isn’t just celebrated in Turkey, it is celebrated by Muslims all over the world.

This year, preparation for Kurban Bayram begins on the eve of the festival, today August 31st. Kurban Bayram will run from and including 1st – 4th September and government offices, schools, post offices, banks, and some supermarkets will be closed throughout these days. Turkish people will be busy visiting family and friends, so roads, transport, hotels and restaurants will be very busy and full during the festivities.

What is my experience?
I lived in Turkey for a couple of bayram celebrations and the atmosphere during this time is very special, it’s even something an outsider who doesn’t celebrate can sense. The only thing I can compare it to is Christmas. All the family comes together and enjoys time off from work and school to celebrate.

When we were living there, our landlord invited us downstairs for Turkish tea and to see the animal they were sacrificing. We stood on our balcony and watched as he tied the sheep up, said a prayer and slit its throat. It was all over very quickly. After he had killed it, he cut it’s head off, hung it up and began to skin it, then he cut its feet off, finished skinning it and cut its organs out. The wool and skin was left out to dry and the blood all washed away. That was it. Normally the sacrifice is supposed to be carried out by a professional in designated areas. It is not supposed to be done publicly in parks or playgrounds nowadays.

The sacrifice was over very quickly and it was very humane, it could be very disturbing for some people to watch though. It upset me a little, but it’s good to be reminded where your food comes from. Meat is so readily available in supermarkets these days that we all take it for granted and don’t really stop to think about where it really comes from.

The meat is given out to poor people, friends and neighbours. We got given a whole leg, it was a bit weird seeing it in my freezer.

In the evening we all gathered around for a barbeque downstairs in the garden (we all know how Turks like their bbq’s, don’t we?!) and of course the only thing on the menu was the meat that had formed part of a fluffy white sheep in my garden only a few hours earlier.

I have seen comments from people in the past who say the process of sacrificing millions of sheep over a few days for a religious festival is barbaric and inhumane, however, the meaning behind the tradition and the process of giving meat to those less fortunate people is a good one in my opinion, it is not meaningless killing for the sake of it, it has a purpose. Some people do find this an outdated, old fashioned tradition and some modern families like to donate money to charity instead.

Those normal tourists on holiday are very unlikely to see anything going on, they will probably be blissfully unaware of the sacrificing going on, as I mentioned above, it is often only done in designated areas in main towns. In the days leading up to Kurban Bayram you may have seen truck loads of sheep and goats being taken to towns, villages and cities. You will know the fate of those livestock on board. You may notice restaurants and hotels more busy than normal so it’s a good idea to book in advance if you plan to visit or go out during the next few days. Remember banks will be closed and ATM’s may run out of cash. It is a nice idea to wish people happy holidays by saying ”Iyi Bayramlar”.

As we are in England this year, we won’t be doing anything to celebrate – we are both working Friday, but we are off all weekend so may buy some meat and have a BBQ on our balcony or something!

Iyi Bayramlar!

AUGUST PHOTO SERIES – DAY 6 – PLAYFUL STREET DOGS

Posted on August 6, 2017 by livingtheturkishdream

I took this photo last March in Calis. We were sat on the wall along the beach enjoying the sunset, and I realised we weren’t alone. Three little street dogs were just running along the beach chasing each other and rolling around in the sand. I just love how happy they all look with their tails in the air and ears flapping – it’s not an easy life for street dogs in Turkey, so it was lovely to see them just running along having fun together. My favourite is the little dog at the front, so cute. I love how they look like little silhouettes against the orange glowing sky behind. I guess humans aren’t the only ones who can appreciate a Calis Beach sunset!
❤

Village life – Beyagac, Denizli.

Posted on May 31, 2017 by livingtheturkishdream

Village life in Turkey is totally different to city life or tourist resort life – there’s nothing quite like it and it’s like marmite, you either love it or you hate it!

Berkay’s family live in Beyağaç, a town in Denizli province, 2 hours away from Denizli city centre. It takes around 3.5 hours by car from Fethiye, and is a fairly straightforward drive. It’s pretty much in the middle of nowhere – surrounded by fields, mountains and forest. Most of the people who live in the village own their own fields and grow their own crops, tobacco plants, or keep farm animals. The views from the family home across the hillside are stunning.

Berkay’s family live in a small bungalow house up on a hill, a few minutes drive from the town centre. Their house has a lounge, kitchen, 2 bedrooms, wet room/toilet and outdoor toilet. Three people live in the house at the moment, Berkay’s Dad, Stepmum and half brother.
I’m going to be honest, I really struggle to cope when visiting, the lifestyle just isn’t for me. They just do things so differently. One example I can’t get my head around, is the sleeping situation. They do have one bed, but they mostly sleep on cushions on the floor, in one room together, and there’s no real night-time routine, they just go to bed in the clothes they’ve been in all day, wake up in the morning, put the cushion away and carry on the next day in the same clothes, just like taking a giant nap. I also have no idea where they keep their clothes as nobody seems to own wardrobes, or have any real personal space. The village is very traditional too, with the men going out to work, and spending the evenings playing okey or tavla while the women stay at home, cook and look after the children – I guess like the UK 60 years ago. Women and men seem to be separated a alot, too, with definite ‘no go’ areas for women, which isn’t easy when I try to follow Berkay everywhere, as I can’t understand ‘ village turkish’ to talk to anyone else – the dialect is so different.

Behind the house, they have sheds built for the animals. They have a lot of sheep, goats, cows, chickens, a guard dog, and of course our dog Boncuk! They use the animals for their eggs and milk. Berkay’s dad wakes up very early everyday to milk the cows – they even make their own yogurt, butter and cheese from it. They do use their own animals for meat, but only on special occasions, as they get more money for selling the livestock.

The family house is very simple, but it has everything they need, including a soba (wood burner) for heating in winter, cooker, washing machine and the slightly more suprising dishwasher and very nice Samsung fridge. From looking at the house, you would think they don’t have much money, a very simple lifestyle, bare minimum things. But this isn’t the case, they do have money, they just invest it in a lot of land, animals and business. Berkay’s father owns a animal feed business, supplying and delivering hundreds of bags of food and hay to houses every week, which as you can imagine in a farming community is a good business to own. I asked Berkay why they don’t improve their house rather than buy more land, as with the money they have they could really have a totally different lifestyle, but he said that things like that aren’t really important to the people in this village, they have what they need. Although I will never understand their lifestyle, I guess it’s something to admire – how they don’t place importance on such material things! Berkay has inherited that attitude to material things, too. I have to force him to buy clothes, as he’d be happy with 2 tshirts and a pair of jeans to last him years!

One thing you can definitely say, is that the Turkish people are very hospitable! The number of blankets Berkay’s stepmum has in the cupboard really made me smile – she has two cupboards piled up with spare cushions and duvets, so that guests can sleep – very prepared, she must’ve had about 30 different ones! They also will keep feeding you until you’re full enough to burst, and don’t take no for an answer. If you turn down a cup of Turkish tea, you can guarantee that you’ll get one anyway.

Dinner time is a little different in the village, instead of being seated around a dining room table on chairs, they eat every meal on the floor around a special ‘table’cloth. People joining them for dinner don’t have their own plates, but instead share from various sized metal dishes, each with a different food inside. Everyone has their own fork and spoon, but they don’t use knives, which sometimes proves troublesome when it comes to larger pieces! Everyone also drinks from the same water glass. The good thing about eating this way is you can eat as much or as little food as you want, without the pressure of wanting to empty your plate so as not to offend. I do like sitting on the floor to eat, but it does give you terrible pins and needles after a while! I suspect if someone has a cold the sharing thing isn’t so pleasant.

I love the different colours and patterns of the rugs they put on the floor, although it does baffle me why they don’t just buy the same kind. Underneath all these rugs and mats they have wooden floor, but it’s kept covered all winter and summer. I love the different patterns but it would drive someone with OCD crazy for sure.

The first day we were in the village, Berkay’s brother asked him to help deliver some hay, as part of the family business. I decided to go with him. Off we went in a big, rickety, dusty truck, to the huge barn where they keep the hay. Berkay and his brother filled up the truck with bales while I sat around the corner wondering what on earth I was doing. 24 hours before this moment, I had been sat in a 5* all inclusive hotel, and now I was sat in a pile of hay, covered in dust and surrounded by the smell of animal poo. What a difference a day makes! Certainly a tale of two halves, two totally different lifestyles and two totally different sets of people.

Later that evening , having recovered from the inital shock of village life which always hits me like a ton of bricks (or hay bales?), I wandered around the family farm and took a moment to appreciate the scenery. It is beautiful. I love this photo I took of the sun going down, greenhouse to the left, sheep shed to the right, pile of fire wood in the foreground, and bird soaring in the background.

Dinner time provided entertainment in the form of Boncuk. We all sat outside on the patio to enjoy chicken cooked on the fire, with a special guest peeping her head over the wall behind Berkay’s dad, hoping for some leftovers! Can you spot her? She looked so funny, every now and then her little head would just pop up, until someone threw her a piece. Adorable.

The next morning, me and Berkay decided to go for a mini-adventure to a view point across Beyağaç. As we were getting in the car, Boncuk jumped in and joined us, so we took her too. Everytime we visit the village we come up to this point as it provides lovely panoramic views. This time there was a new addition to the view – 3 old, falling apart arm chairs. Interesting. I guess fly tipping is a universal problem! It did make a good photo though.

Berkay drove along to the next village, Yeniçeşme , to show me the house he was born in, I took a photo of the building, which is now falling apart but still inhabited, I love the fact you can see Boncuk in the wing mirror! Berkay kept pointing out places he used to go with his friends as a child, fields he used to work in, and things his Grandad built like the village water source. Berkay always speaks highly of his grandparents, they raised him as a baby as his mother and dad abandoned him when he was only 28 days old, he’s still not seen his mother since and knows nothing about her, and although he is on speaking terms with his dad, he definitely had a stronger bond with his grandparents, who have both now passed away, he showed me the cemetery they’re both in too.

Back at the family home, I had a walk around finding interesting things to photograph – you’re never far away from something with a story behind it! These red peppers are picked when they’re in season, and hung out to dry out in the summer, then they’re used in stews and other dishes when not normally readily available. Aside from their main purpose, I think they make great decorations!

After dinner, despite being stuffed, plates of walnuts, biscuits, popcorn and tea were bought out. The funniest thing was Berkay’s stepmum breaking the biscuit in half and dipping it into her glass of cay, its the equivalent of dipping a rich tea in a mug of PG tips, I’d never seen a Turkish person do that before so I giggled to myself – seems like us Brits have a rival for our tea and biscuits!

That night, we visited Berkay’s brother’s girlfriend and her family about an hour away. Upon telling her of my love of baggy village pants, they went to their stash, ironed a pair and gave them to me in a bag as a gift, along with a pair of crocheted slippers they had made – it took so many attempts to find a pair that would fit me, I felt like Cinderella! Another fine example of their hospitality.

The following morning, we said goodbye to the family, and Boncuk, and got ready for the drive to Denizli city centre. The photo below is of us with Berkay’s brother just before we said bye – my eyes were red and blotchy after bawling my eyes out saying bye to Boncuk 10 minutes before hand. I’ve deliberately left her out of this post and will do a whole new post about her, she’s so cute she deserves her own one!

Village life in Beyağaç is so different than anything I’m used to. It’s way beyond my comprehension, but it is interesting and always provides me with plenty of funny stories! I could never live there myself, but after the initial shock, it’s not too hard to settle in to the way of life, become a bit more comfortable and embrace it – however, it is always a bit of a relief to leave again at the end of the visit, even with blurry eyes from teary goodbyes.

Happy 3 years Boncuk!

Posted on November 4, 2015 by livingtheturkishdream

Exactly 3 years ago today Berkay and I were sat on our little balcony in Calis, eating dinner when we heard a high pitched crying puppy… it sounded very close so we popped our heads over the balcony but couldn’t see anything. We finished eating our dinner, and still hearing the noise, we went down the stairs to see where it was coming from. What we found was a teeny, tiny cream coloured puppy who was tied to a post outside our landlord’s apartment below ours.

The puppy was obviously very scared and had been left there, with no food or water, and just a piece of rope tied tightly around its foot, so tightly that it couldn’t put it’s foot down or walk. We had milk in the fridge so Berkay went upstairs to get some and made a make-shift dog bowl out of the end of a plastic coke bottle… Our landlord came back from wherever he’d been and Berkay said ‘what’s this?’, the landlord looked and didn’t even notice the dog, then did a double-take and realised what we were talking about… “allah allah, bu ne lan?!”. He insisted he didn’t know where the dog had come from or why it was there but that we could keep it if we wanted, so long as it was kept in the garden and not in the house (I think he was hoping she’d act as a guard dog for his farm animals too). Him and Berkay then proceeded to make a temporary dog house out of an upside down crate, a plastic sheet, hay and some bricks. Luckily we had a small harness and lead in our apartment that was used for our rabbit (yes, a harness and lead for our rabbit… don’t ask..) and even though it was intended for smaller animals, it fit the puppy perfectly.

An urgent trip to the pet shop for food, collar and other supplies and a phonecall to Berkay’s vet friend and we were all set up. The vet came out and checked the puppy over and gave it some injections and estimated it was around 5-6 weeks old. None of us had any idea where the puppy had come from, or why it was left there, but we all fell in love with it instantly and Berkay decided to name it Boncuk…

Why do I keep referring to her as ‘it’ you ask? Well… that’s because for the first 3 months we had her we thought she was a boy. The landlord told us that it was a boy when he first spotted her, and for some insane reason we never thought to check… So our little girl dog Boncuk was known as our little boy dog Boncuk for 3 months. Hilarious, embarrassing, and it also led to a fairly mad rush to the vet in February 2013 once we realised that he was actually a she, so that we could get her spayed before she ended up having puppies herself.

Now, 3 years on, our cute, tiny Boncuk is more than 10 times the size, weight and height of that little puppy we found (not that she realises this, she still insists on trying to fit on your lap), but still just as cute. She was the cutest puppy ever, I don’t know how anyone could ever have just left her. She had the exact definition of ‘puppy dog eyes’ and the most adorable, innocent, scared little face. One of my favourite things about her is her funny little nose, it was always black with half the colour missing and pinky… it’s still like that now.

Such a special little doggy. Berkay’s brother sends me photo updates every few weeks but I miss her a lot. I can’t wait til we’re reunited again! I’m so glad she was left near our apartment and that we found her.

Happy 3 years Boncuk! ❤

Trees, sunsets and a hidden mine.

Posted on January 18, 2015 by livingtheturkishdream

While we were in the village of Beyağaç back in November, we drove up a mountain road to a forest area and explored a little whilst hunting for mushrooms.

While we were up there the sun began to set and the trees looked absolutely beautiful with the orange glow behind them and I couldn’t resist taking a few photos as they just looked so magical!

While we were wandering around we came across a mine, I’m not sure if it’s still in use but it was pretty creepy. I checked online and I believe its a chromite mine. I wandered down to the entrance and had a peek in, there were spider webs everywhere and it was really eerie, I don’t know how anyone manages to work in mines like this, it wasn’t very tall at all… it reminded me of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs!

We also found a huge hole in the ground, all sorts of weird and wonderful creatures live up in the mountains I’m sure, any suggestions as to what might have been living in this? It was quite wide and very deep, I couldn’t see the bottom.

We could see all of Beyağaç from the mountain, the views were stunning… fields, trees and farm land in all directions as far as the eye could see. It was so peaceful up there, although a little scary with the mine and I had visions of whatever animal was hidden in that giant hole coming out and chasing us back to the car… What a story that would have been!

Village adventure – day 3

Posted on December 3, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

We woke up on our last day in the village and knew we were going to be busy – we planned to leave the village at 12pm and travel to the nearest city center to visit more of Berkay’s relatives. The previous day Berkay’s dad had announced that since all the family was going to be together (including me, Berkay and both his brothers), something that happens very rarely, he was going to kill one of the animals from his garden so that we could all have a big family BBQ.
By the time we had woken up, had a shower and packed our bags ready to go, it was 10 o clock and Berkay’s grandad had just arrived to do the honors. I walked over to him to say hello with the traditional hand/head kiss and he seemed impressed by this, even more so when he said ‘nasilsin?’ and I answered in Turkish. There wasn’t much time to sit around and talk and we all headed out to the garden. I was walking around having one last look at all the animals and became friends with a goat, I was talking to him (yes…talking…) and he was licking my hand, it was all very sweet. Little did I know, that an hour later I’d be eating this goat for dinner.

Just 10 minutes after my encounter with the goat, Berkay’s brother walked into it’s little pen and led it around to the side of the house where they had been digging a hole. I knew what this meant, the poor goat was the chosen one.

I’m not sure what possessed me, but after giving him one last little stroke, I stood and watched as they removed it’s collar, laid it down with it’s head over the hole in the ground and tied it’s legs together. The goat didn’t protest at all, I guess it knew what was coming as much as the rest of us. Berkay’s grandad slit the goat’s neck, the blood drained out into the hole and that was that. Over in minutes. Quick, calm and as a little suffering to the goat as possible.

The worst part for me came after, was watching his grandad strip down a piece of skin from the goats ankle and blow air (from his own mouth…) into it, blowing the poor goat up like a balloon. I wasn’t entirely sure of the purpose of this, but I researched online and it says it makes it easier to skin them by doing this first. At this point I decided I didn’t want to watch anymore, and wandered back to the other animals instead, one of the sheep had actually escaped the pen it was in and was actually stood watching what they were doing to the goat… I wonder if it actually understood what was going on though.

I went with Berkay in the car to pick up his cousin and her daughter, who were coming back to the family house to enjoy the BBQ with the rest of us. It was a 20 minute drive and by the time we got back, the goat had been fully skinned and its meat was now lying on trays being chopped up into pieces. Including it’s head, eye, brain, intestines, liver and other organs. Bleugh. The family will probably make soup and other dishes out of these parts, they certainly don’t waste any edible parts – they even gave their dog the goats four raw hooves.

We all sat down to eat the BBQ, which included the lovely çintar mushrooms we’d found the day before, and it was really delicious. Of course I felt sorry for the poor animal we were eating, but I’m not vegetarian and eat alot of meat. We don’t usually think about where our food comes from because it’s all cleaned, neatly packaged and sold on supermarket shelves, we take it for granted and don’t consider where it actually comes from, so it’s definitely interesting, although a little disturbing, to see the process from furry animal in the garden to lump of cooked meat on your plate.

After eating, it was time to say our goodbyes. Berkay’s step-mum cried when we were going and gave us both big hugs. She is really sweet, she sent us home with a massive bag of onions, spinach, spring onions, nuts, butter, chicken and leftover goat, all things grown on their farm! I really, surprisingly enjoyed our time in the village, and I really didn’t expect to. It was just so peaceful there, so relaxing and it felt so far away from everything else, no worries, no thinking about anything.

us with Berkay’s stepmum.

But now it was time to change out of the village baggy pants, say bye to the lovely people and views and head to the city instead…

Village adventure – Day 2

Posted on December 1, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

When I woke up the morning after we arrived in the village and looked out of the window, I won’t lie, I definitely thought ‘what on earth am I doing here?’ – it was the first time I’d seen the place in daylight (at least since I’d visited 3 years ago..) and to someone not used to living this way, it was quite a shock to the system.

The room we were sleeping in was now freezing as the soba had been turned off all night, so as soon as we woke up we bundled into the living room with the rest of the household and sat around their recently lit soba, there’s something very cosy about the soba, it reminds me of Christmas with everyone sitting around the fire in their pajamas. We weren’t up for long when Berkay’s aunt walked in and started making breakfast right away, as I mentioned previously she’s kind of taken the role of housekeeper on now that Berkay’s mum is sick.

She came out with a tray of breakfast foods, spicy Turkish sausage (sucuk), tomatoes, olives, boiled eggs and some sort of lentil dish which was lovely to dip the bread in! Of course this was all washed down with a few glasses of Turkish tea. While we were eating Berkay’s brother had a phonecall that the daily village delivery of coal had arrived and said that he and Berkay could go an unload it all for some cash. I could have waited in the house with Berkay’s mum and aunt, but I knew that when Berkay said ‘we’ll only be gone 2 hours’ he was talking Turkish time, and I learnt a long time ago that Turkish time means add on at least 2 hours more to everything they say, so I decided to go with them. I had a quick shower, which was much like having a shower at our own house, no hot water from the solar panels and no electric shower meant it was a boiled water from the stove and a jug job – no complaints from me as I’m definitely used to that by now!

We drove to the village centre and as it was freezing cold outside and the boys had work to do, I sat in the warm car watching them and being nosey at the surroundings. I wanted to have a walk around the town, but I would undoubtedly be the only woman down there, so I thought I’d feel a little uncomfortable and decided against it. Instead I sat in the car with my laptop writing a couple of blog posts. I’d look up every so often and see Berkay pushing a heavy wheelbarrow full of sacks of coal into the warehouse while his brother and a friend were on the truck moving the thousands of sacks into his reach. It definitely looked like hard work, and the fact they were sweating when it was a mere 6 oc outside said it all. They briefly stopped for lunch and we all shared some pide, which was delicious. The boys stunk and were covered in black dust from the coal, but eventually 4 hours after they had started their ‘just two hours’ job (*cough*… Turkish time…) they unloaded the last sack and off the truck drove back to wherever it came from. Berkay got 60tl for his effort, which is very good money for just a few hours work, he’d been working here in Calis recently earning 20tl for a 12 hour day! It’s so typical of Berkay to be working during his little holiday, he hates sitting around doing nothing.

When we arrived back at the village house it was around 2pm and more of Berkay’s family had arrived to visit him, his uncle, aunt, cousins and even second cousins were all there to greet us. Berkay’s other aunt had once again been preparing a meal and came out with a huge tray of food for everyone present. We all gathered on the floor, sat around the tray and tucked in – this time it was salad, kuru fasulye, bulgur rice, dried meat and onion and a huge bowl of garlicky yogurt to dip bread into. After our pide we weren’t really hungry but know they get offended if you decline food, no matter how politely, so we ended up eating some anyway.

After an hour or two of more chatting and cay drinking, the guests left, Berkay’s mum had a nap, his dad was at work, his brother was busy with the animals and we had some time to ourselves. We had a quick look around their garden and farm area behind the family home, I’d been dying to see the animals ever since we arrived. I love animals and love the idea of having a farm, although I’d be rubbish at it as I’d never be able to bring myself to kill them for meat or sell them, I’d get far too attached. Berkay’s family has a lot of animals – sheep, cows, goats, chickens, turkeys and a dog. Berkay’s dad wakes up at 6am every morning to milk the cows and they use the milk for drinking and for making butter. They have a baby cow which is only a week or two old, they still feed it with a bottle! It was so cute and so fluffy, I stepped into the cow shed and managed to stroke it – I love this photo of it trying to lick my hand – what an action shot! They also have one lamb at the moment, just look how in love with it Berkay was.

While we were walking around I couldn’t help but think how beautiful and picturesque the scenery was – so much countryside, farms and green hills as far as the eye could see.

Since we had some time to ourselves, Berkay said he wanted to take me for a drive so that he could show me the house he has born in and a few other important places for him around the village. He kept pointing out things his Grandad had made and built, trees Berkay himself had planted as a child with his nan and telling me stories of the things he had done with them. He always speaks highly of his grandparents, they raised him as a baby as his mother and dad abandoned him when he was only 28 days old, he’s still not seen his mother since and knows nothing about her, and although he is on speaking terms with his dad, he definitely had a stronger bond with his grandparents, who have both now passed away, he showed me the cemetery they’re both in too.

He drove us up to Esentepe just as the sun started to go down and we got out to take a photo of the beautiful scenery – it was pretty to look at but it was freezing cold, I ended up wearing my hoodie and Berkay’s thick leather jacket on top! The sun was just starting to go down but before it did Berkay said he wanted to wander through the trees and try and find some çintar mushrooms – special wild mushrooms that are a seasonal delicacy here in the south west of Turkey. A few minutes after starting searching I heard him shout “Danni, come here, I found one!” he was so excited.

He’s definitely the expert at finding them, he knew how to spot them under a pile of twigs and I was just walking around aimlessly not really knowing what I was looking for… I found a lot of ‘normal’ mushrooms, but no çintar ones, until I spotted a giant orange thing sticking out of the ground.. “look how big this one is…” I said, and then Berkay informed me it was exactly what we were looking for. I was very proud of our little mushroom stash, you’ve heard of the saying “bringing home the bacon”, well we were definitely “bringing home the mushrooms” and we took them all back to Berkay’s family ready to eat on the BBQ the next day.

After all the mushroom picking, food eating and tea drinking, we were exhausted and settled back in the house for the evening. I decided to change my outfit to fit in a bit more and put on my comfy ‘village’ flowery baggy pants. We ended up going to Berkay’s aunts house with his brothers and played OKEY, ate more sunflower seeds and drunk more tea… I was starting to think I’d end up looking like a glass of tea if I drank anymore…

Our village adventure – Day 1

Posted on November 26, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

Berkay’s family have been asking us to visit them for a long time and it was just impossible during the summer, however, now that it’s winter and life is moving by at a slower pace, we had the chance to make the trip. His step-mum is quite ill and recovering from an operation so we were hoping our visit would cheer her up a little.

They live in a town called Beyağaç in the Denizli province, it’s a town 1.5-2 hours away from the city centre. Instead of travelling on the bus from Fethiye for 6 hours, we rented a car for a relatively cheap amount (150tl for 3 days) and made the journey in just 4 hours instead, even with the cost of running it taken into consideration, it doesn’t work out much more expensive than the bus tickets, that’s the plus side of having a car that runs on LPG instead of petrol.

We left Fethiye at 1.45 pm on Friday and arrived at the village at around 6.15 pm. I was really looking forward to the drive because I knew it would be beautiful and I wasn’t disappointed, we had amazing views of the mountains and it was a relatively easy journey with nice roads. That’s the beauty of Turkey, you can reach almost any city just by following a single road. When in one place you can see sign posts pointing in all directions, directing you to other cities hundreds of miles away. Imagine being in London and seeing a sign post for ‘Manchester’ – it would be weird, but it’s normal here. So simple.

As we were driving further inland, we began to feel a bit chilly. When we reached a town near Tavas and stopped to fill up on gas, we realised just how cold it was. Freezing. We had to turn the car heater on to defrost ourselves.

Eventually we reached the town of Beyağaç, it’s actually a lot larger than I remember, with a population of 7000 people. Driving through the main town centre I saw a few apartment blocks, a post office, police station, school etc.. and of course the customary Ataturk statue (there’s one of these in every single town in Turkey). It’s very much a working farming town – most of the businesses deal with fixing tractors, delivering and supplying coal, animal food etc..

Berkay’s family live a 5-10 minute car drive from the main town centre, up on a hill surrounded by fields and beautiful scenery. They have wooden shacks behind their house full of animals, sheep, goats, chickens and cows. They use the cows for their milk, eggs and meat. They even make butter from the cow’s milk. Almost every fruit or vegetable they eat they have grown themselves. Everything there is very simple, back to basics.

We went inside and were greeted by his step-mum (from now on I’ll just call her his mum, as he has never met his birth mum), aunt and brother. All gave me a big hug and kisses both sides of my cheeks, as is the norm here in Turkey! ‘Who is that?’ I said to Berkay referring to the neighbours sitting in the living room that also joined in the hugging, ‘no idea’ he said… You have got to love their friendliness! After the welcome greetings were over, I felt a little more relaxed, I’m always nervous about that first ‘hello’ – mainly because I always end up in a panic about the polite way to do it. It’s normal here when greeting someone significantly older than yourself, to kiss their hand and then raise it to touch your forehead. It’s polite and shows that you respect your elders. The only person who really expects this in Berkay’s family is his father (and elderly neighbours etc). As it happened, his father arrived later than us so I had time to prepare for ‘the hand kiss’, I seriously practiced with myself first…

After his father arrived it was time for dinner. Berkay’s aunt is the main carer of the house, she goes every day and cooks, cleans etc, mainly because Berkays mum is ill, but also because her husband died a few years ago and her daughter has her own husband and house to take care of. I think she enjoys going to other people’s houses to spend her time being useful and so that she’s not so lonely.

The village is very traditional, the women do not work, they just stay home, cook, clean and look after the children and animals. I suppose it’s like going back in time 50 odd years in the UK , when housewives were the norm, and not frowned upon like they are today (in my experience, stay at home mums etc are often considered ‘lazy’). If I were to walk around the town centre, I would stick out like a sore thumb and it would be very apparent that I’m not from the area, not because I’m a foreigner, but because I’m a woman. There are just no women wandering around there, ever.

Anyway, the dinner was lovely. We had rice, chicken (fresh from the garden), an aubergine dish, yogurt and some fresh crusty bread. It was served in the traditional way here, in big metal bowls on a large tray on a blanket on the floor. The whole family sits on the floor to eat and shares food from the same bowl/plate, although everyone has their own fork/spoon. I really like this way of eating actually, it used to be a strange concept but now we do it so often it’s normal. It works out well if you don’t like a certain food too, instead of being served a plate of something and feeling under pressure to eat it, you can avoid it and take spoons of something you do like instead, they’ll never even notice! I avoided the yogurt, as I’ve still not quite grasped the concept of having yogurt served with dinner, but very much enjoyed the aubergine as I have become addicted to that since living in Turkey this time!

After dinner, everyone sat down with a glass of Cay and had a gossip, I have no idea what they were saying as I find it really difficult to understand a word. When in Fethiye, I can understand a lot, but there in the village it was different, I don’t know if it’s the dialect or if they just speak at super speed, but I can’t keep up with it. I just sat taking the atmosphere all in instead.

We were then served another large tray of fruit, watermelon, oranges, grapes, apples etc, sunflower seeds, nuts and cake. I didn’t want any but it’s rude to say no so I ended up eating a whole bowl of sunflower seeds, as you do, it’s impossible to eat just one!

We were really tired after the day of travelling so as soon as the neighbours went home at 10pm we headed to bed. Berkay’s mum wouldn’t let us sleep on the sofas in the living room or the cushions in the other bedroom (there’s only one bed in the house)- she made us take her bed instead, even though she’s sick. Bless her. These people might not have much themselves, but they are very welcoming and would give you anything.

Part 2 of our village trip coming soon!

Autumn in Calis – waggy tails, pretty flowers & cold pools..

Posted on November 16, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

I’m sat writing this watching the lightening flash through my windows and the rain pelting down on the roof, but yesterday was the first day of bad weather we’ve had for 3 weeks, November has been spoiling us with daytime temperatures of around 24oc, although the evenings are very cool, I’ve even managed to get tan lines back!

November meant the hotel Berkay worked in closed, so he has been looking for work since, he’s found a temporary job at the moment but the pay is so bad and unreliable, I don’t think he’ll stay there long. We’ve been spending some much needed time together and alot of that time has been spent at the closed hotel, playing with Boncuk!

As soon as she sees us approaching the hotel she comes running over to us with a fast wagging tail. We sit for ages with her and play ball, she’s begun to love the water and has been running in and out of the shallow pool although all this rain we’ve had today probably means it will be slimy and green very soon as its not cleaned during the winter season …

We even braved the pool ourselves last week, I don’t know what possessed us, it was absolutely freezing! It was a particularly warm day for November, around 25oc, but the pool water was definitely not warm. It was the first time we’ve been swimming in over a month, Berkay jumped straight in but his face said it all, I eased myself in and after about 20 minutes ended up in the deep end although only for a couple of minutes as it really was so cold, it made my head hurt!

The hotel grounds aren’t very well kept in the winter, although there are still some beautiful flowers around at the moment keeping the place looking summery and cheerful.

Boncuk absolutely loves it there, when we walk past to get the bus to Fethiye we can see her through the fence wandering around and enjoying herself, although it breaks my heart everytime we leave her she runs up and down the length of the fence poking her face through the holes and crying for us. She knows now when it’s time to leave and runs in front of us trying to stop us getting to the exit, bless her! She’s being really spoilt with attention at the moment.

Just before I started writing this post, we popped down to the hotel to feed Boncuk and place her back in her kennel as she’s safer in there during this bad weather. The underneath of the hotel was all flooded and Berkay had to turn pumps on to get rid of all the water, it’s funny how quickly the weather changes, I hope the sun arrives back on Monday as forecast!