Calis changes, dog walks & the canal..

Posted on March 2, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

On his day off Berkay likes to go walking through Calis.

He took Boncuk with him and went for a long walk up a hill with a beautiful view from the top (click here to see my old post with photos of the view!) We used to take her for a walk everyday and more often than not ended up walking to the top of this hill, we always had it to ourselves which meant Boncuk could run free off the lead safely, with no cars, people or other animals nearby. She loves to sit up there and have cuddles, look down over Calis or just play fetch. It’s so peaceful there.

On the way back to the hotel they stay in, they took the road that goes past our old apartment (the top floor)… This apartment is nothing special, in fact it was pretty poor, and only 350tl a month, the equivalent of around £100 (which was still half of Berkay’s entire income!) .. but it was ours. It still makes me sad imagining other people in our house, cooking in our kitchen, sleeping in our room, sitting on our balcony… I try not to think about it too much, because when I do it just upsets me.
Click here for an old post with more photos of inside the apartment.

Anyway, after they got back to the hotel, Berkay left Boncuk and carried on walking to the investigate the new-look canal. I’ve mentioned in a previous post about the changes they are doing, but I really can’t believe how different it looks.
Here’s a photo of the canal (left) taken a year ago, and the new, wider, cleaner canal with no plants (right) taken last week, both photos taken in the exact same place.

The changes they’re making are all for the better, it’s going to look like a different place when I go back!

Calis – a warm winter’s day.

Posted on February 26, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

I have written a post before about Fethiye in winter, but everyone says it’s a been a mild one this year, not as cold or wet as usual, and judging by the photos Berkay sends me everyday, it’s starting to get warmer.

These photos were all taken on Sunday during his day off, how beautiful is Calis out of season before all the flights full of tourists start to arrive? Calis, like most resorts I assume, is like a different place in winter.

On a summers day the main promenade is full of holiday makers, enjoying a walk or making their way to the beach, cooling down in the restaurants and cafe’s with an efes and icecream, or just sitting on the wall looking out to sea. The beach is full of towels, sunbeds and sunbathers, and the restaurants are all bustling with tables and chairs lining the length of the promenade.

In winter, as you can see from the photos, it’s a different story. Peaceful empty pavements, silent empty beaches and eerie empty spaces where the restaurants are closed for winter. It’s not completely dead with tumble weeds passing by, some restaurants are open, and still fairly busy, like Nil Bar, which is popular with expats and locals all year around.

The beach is sandier in winter, perhaps because of the fierce waves bringing fresh sand and shingle to shore? But it’s also a lot messier and there is litter everywhere, unfortunately.

I used to love walking along the main seafront promenade in winter, in fact it was pretty much the online time I ever did, unless my family were visiting. It’s a totally different atmosphere, and even more beautiful.

One of the most beautiful things, are the winter Calis Beach sunsets. Berkay had a great view from his fishing spot, didn’t he?

We’ll soon start to see the restaurants gearing up for the season, and the hotel pools start to fill again. In a month or two, the planes will start arriving and Calis will be once again transformed, it’s never really bustling and busy like the resorts of Bodrum or Marmaris, but it’s certainly a big change.

Have you ever visited the main resorts outside of the summer season? How does it compare? For the better, or for the worse?

New job, visas & keeping it real.

Posted on February 16, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

It’s been a big week this week.

I finally started back at work, been waiting for 2 months for them to sort out the contract! It’s a full time office job and only a 3 month temporary role, but hopefully they may keep me on afterwards. Not going to lie though, it’s been hard adjusting back to working life!

Starting back at work has made me feel really frustrated. Frustrated about the visa rules keeping us apart. In order to meet the income requirements for Berkay to come to the UK, I need to be earning another £2,600 a year. Without getting a second job and working all weekend also, in order to make up the difference I need over £21,000 in savings. I really don’t know where these rules came from, how does a shortfall of £2,600 equate to anything near £21k? Ironically, If I did earn the required income I’d really be no better off, travelling to 2 jobs would cost more, and the more money I earn, the more I’ll be paying my parents for rent. I’ve been feeling really down about it, I feel like I’m getting nowhere and that every penny I earn is meaningless, I can save it up, sure, but what use is money when you have nobody to spend it with?

I know it’s a long process, and I’m finally on the first step of the ladder, but it’s still frustrating. I’m impatient. Having Berkay so far away and seeing him for a couple of minutes on Skype everyday isn’t enough. How can we cope like this for years? It’s seriously depressing me. ‘Keep positive’ everyone says, but knowing we have another 2 years+, at the very least, of living like this is so frustrating and upsetting.

I’m also feeling jealous of other people, and I know I really shouldn’t. Jealous of people who only spend a few weeks apart at a time. Jealous of people who have their husbands here for months at a time on a visit visa and wondering why that’s just not possible for us. In theory, Berkay could have stayed here for 6 months, that would be wonderful, but then there’s our dog Boncuk to think about, and he needs to be earning money, my parents wouldn’t let him stay with us for free, so we couldn’t afford that either. I find myself becoming more jealous of these people everyday, and more and more frustrated that I can never see us being in the same position as them. Berkay works bloody hard in Turkey, 12-15 hour days for less than £250 a month, yet he’s never in a better position. I don’t know what else he can do?

‘Don’t pay for his flight, make him pay for something and save’ my Dad says. He has no idea. The cost of living in Turkey is cheaper than the UK, yes, but not that much cheaper that makes living on £250 a month possible. Thank God Berkay doesn’t have to pay rent, water, or electricity currently. But he still has phone bills, travel costs, food costs, he still has to eat, and so does Boncuk. He has debt to pay off. He hasn’t even had a full months wages since October. Roll on summer when he’ll be earning more money.

I’m finding myself getting frustrated with people telling me they know how I feel, when they really don’t. All they’ve ever known is seeing their partner once every 3 months for a week, whereas I’ve lived there for 2.5 years, woke up next to him, slept next to him, ate meals with him.. Living 2.5 years of your life seeing each other every single day, then going to see them once every 3 months is just not the same.

People are being supportive, some tell me I should get back on a plane to Turkey… ~~as if I need any convincing 😉 ,~~ others tell me I’m doing the right thing and that we’ll get there eventually. Neither really make me feel better. I just feel stuck. There is no easy way out. No quick fix.

I seem to have caused quite a bit of controversy in the past couple of days by airing my feelings on the internet, but one of the reasons I started this blog was to have a space for my own thoughts, so apologies if It’s not always happy, rainbows and butterflies. I say what I mean, and mean what I say, I try to keep it real, It wouldn’t be a true representation of my life if I only wrote the positive things on here. I welcome all comments, even if it’s not always what I want to hear!

I only hope it will be worth all the tears and time apart in the end. ❤

Quote : Art Williams.

How did our cheesy, love story begin?

Posted on February 9, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

I’ve mentioned before that our relationship started as the very typical, cheesy, holiday romance story that everyone is so quick to judge, but I’ve never really gone into much detail about how we met, so here it goes!

In July 2010, me and one of my best friends decided to go on holiday, we trusted my Dad to choose the destination, and he chose Calis Beach, Fethiye. We went in July for a week, after we’d finished our A-level exams and had just left college. I was 18 years old…

The hotel we stayed in, who would have thought back then, that I’d eventually be living around the corner to here, walking past it and waving Berkay off to work there everyday for 2 years..

It started off as a normal girly holiday… until roses kept appearing on my sunbed, and outside my room door. (I can see you rolling your eyes…I told you it was a cheesy story!!) I ignored them at first, but eventually realised it was one of the waiters doing it.. you guessed it, this particular waiter was Berkay!

The view from our balcony and the pool, where a lot of time was spent spying on Berkay with my friend 😉

We hardly spoke, actually he could hardly speak English … (I can see you rolling your eyes again!) … on the last night of our holiday, he got his friend to write a note to me saying ‘Do you want to go out for a walk with me’. Going against my mum, dad and everyone else’s advice of ‘don’t go off with anyone on your own’, and risking loosing the friendship I had with my friend by leaving her alone in the hotel on the last night… I went. We went for a walk along the beach and ended up staying there until 5am, just walking back and forth. Luckily, Berkay wasn’t dangerous, and my best friend forgave me for abandoning her. I wouldn’t advise anyone to go off alone like I did though just for the record, I went against my better judgement but thank goodness I did, otherwise I probably wouldn’t have ever seen Berkay again or be who I am today…

This was the first and only photo we had together from July 2010..

The time came to go home, and of course I was devastated, we swapped numbers, msn addresses & facebook ‘friended’ each other, but honestly I didn’t expect to hear from him again, everyone knows the reputation Turkish guys have… Oh how wrong I was, even before I had got to the airport I had a text, and a couple more awaited me when I landed back in the UK.

We spoke everynight on MSN without fail, every night after his work had finished, Berkay would walk to the internet cafe and we’d talk to 3-4am. My family all thought I was crazy of course, and hoped it was all just a holiday romance.

The good old days, back in 2010 when we’d speak to each other on MSN all night, every night.

I decided I wanted to go back and visit Berkay, alone this time, and my parents very, very, very reluctantly agreed. I had strict instructions to keep in contact 24/7 and obviously they knew the hotel address I was staying in.. So, in October 2010 I went back to Turkey for a week, this time we stayed together in Remer Hotel. Although I already knew Berkay well from speaking on MSN everyday, this was our first real chance to get to know each other in person. He had learnt English really quickly, and was pretty fluent by then. I have to add, going abroad alone, flying alone, to meet someone I’d hardly spent time with in person, is very out of character for me, I’m the shyest person I know, people who have met me will probably agree.. I have no idea what came over me.. love makes you do funny things I guess! We had a great week together and done the typical tourist things, we visisted Oludeniz and done a few boat trips, including one in the pouring rain and wind, it was freezing. The most memorable thing from this whole holiday was how we both went in the hotel swimming pool in the cold, stormy rain, and had everyone looking out of their balconys cheering us on, like I said, love makes you do crazy things!

Some of the photos we took together in October 2010.

In January 2011, I decided to visit Berkay again, and did so for a week. This time I felt confident enough to stay in an apartment he was renting in the winter, instead of booking a hotel. The apartment was really bad, it certainly opened up my eyes. I also had a funny Turkish experience on the way to Fethiye from Antalya airport.. Berkay and his friend came to pick me up in his friend’s old banger car.. the fuel gauge was broken and the car kept running out of petrol…the journey should have taken 3.5 hours but ended up taking twice as long. We had another great week together, I met his friends, experienced my first ‘Turkish Picnic’ and enjoyed seeing Turkey outside of the tourist season. Saying bye to Berkay when the time came to go home this time was the hardest, I guess that’s when I knew the only option was to move to Turkey.

A couple of photos from January 2011, this was the turning point when I knew I wanted to move to Turkey.

I can’t remember how the conversation went, but I must’ve told my parents I wanted to move to Turkey, I can’t even remember their reaction, but reluctantly again, they agreed. Neither of them had ever met Berkay, none of my family had, so Mum and her partner at the time, came with me for a week when I made the big move. It was a big decision, one made so much harder as it meant leaving my 3 week old baby sister behind. On the 26th April 2011, I left the UK, packed my life into a suitcase, and moved to Turkey. Whilst there, we had a bad experience which left mum’s partner in hospital for 3 days, this turned out to be a blessing in disguise, as it gave Berkay a chance to prove to her how loving, kind and caring he was. He helped them so much over those few days, that she felt confident enough leaving me with him when they returned to the UK a week later.

April 2011

This is a personal favourite photo. Taken in the first few days after I moved to Turkey, me looking out to sea at Oludeniz. It reminds me how I’d entered the big wide world away from parents and the comforts of home, which were thousands of miles, and oceans away.

Berkay found us an apartment, which until September 2013, we called home. I feel like we proved everyone wrong, it’s not the typical Turkish boy/English girl story. He has now met all of my family, visited the UK 5 times, and is now as much a part of my family as the rest of us, they all love him.

The rest of my story is documented on this blog, from my last few days in Turkey, to the reasons I moved back to the UK, the difficulties to adapting to life back here, the joy at being reunited, and the sadness at being apart again..

Those were the first 3 years, lets hope there are many more to come… I will carry on blogging through all of them.
To be continued… ❤

and the winner is…

Posted on February 1, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

The winner of the little giveaway is….

Pauline!

Congratulations Pauline (no last name provided!) I have sent an email to the email address given when you commented 🙂 Please reply with your address so I can get it sent out to you on Monday.

All 51 names were entered into this random name picker, so it was all decided fairly.

Sorry to everyone else, but thanks for entering and reading! 🙂 If you’re interested, I found the book on amazon here for cheaper than I actually paid for this one… I have ordered one for myself, it’s fab! 🙂

Looking to do another giveaway once I reach 100,000 views, I have a few ideas! 😉

xxx

A little thankyou giveaway..

Posted on January 29, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

117

As a little token of my appreciation, I have decided to do a little giveaway to celebrate hitting 70,000 views..

Don’t get too excited, it’s nothing amazing like a free flight to Turkey…. I wish!! While out shopping today I bought this little Turkish phrase book & audio CD. It’s worth £7.99, and one of you can win it totally for free. Great for learning phrases to impress friends, family or even just to make the locals smile when you surprise them with your Turkish while on your holidays. It is brand new, CD still sealed inside. I have only opened it to take photos, and am now actually wishing I got one for myself too!

All you need to do to be entered is comment on this blog post, by just scrolling down and clicking ”leave a reply’. Only people who comment on THIS post directly, and not via Facebook or anywhere else, will be entered. The giveaway will end on Saturday 1st February and a winner chosen using a random number generator. It’s only open to people in the UK and Ireland unfortunately, as postage costs would be too high with no guarantee of it reaching safely elsewhere, sorry.

A little disclaimer too, I paid for this with my own money, it was not given to me. I also earn no money at all from my blog, I do not get paid per view or receive any income from adverts, I blog entirely for fun, and just wanted to do a tiny giveaway to say a huge thanks for helping me reach 70,000 views, something I am very proud of.

Good luck and thank you all once again.
❤ ❤ ❤

Catching up with Berkay & Boncuk..

Posted on January 26, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

It’s been 3 weeks tomorrow since Berkay went back to Turkey, but it seems like so much longer. The day after he returned he found a job, but quit after a week or so because he was only earning £6.40 a day for 13-15 hours work and he was getting frustrated as the greedy boss was taking all of Berkay’s tips off him. When you’re earning so little, tips make all the difference, it could double his wages.

He’s been walking around all the hotels in Calis and in Fethiye trying to find work, but no luck as of yet, nobody needs staff in winter as most of the hotels are closed, and the ones that remain open are quiet enough that they do not need to employ any new people. All I can say is that it is a good job I’m not there this winter as we wouldn’t survive, no way could we find enough money to even pay rent, without even thinking about bills, food and other costs. Berkay is struggling himself, relying on friends to make him dinner and bring him food as he has zero money himself. It’s difficult for people here to understand, my Dad was moaning because I paid for Berkay’s upcoming flight to the UK in March and he thinks he should be paying for it himself, when that’s not even an option. If I don’t pay, I won’t see him, simple. Sure, at the moment Berkay doesn’t have to pay rent or electric bills, but phone, food and general day to day costs, buses, water, dog food… It all adds up, and earning £6.40 a day for a week hardly gave him an opportunity to save. He is doing his best to find work though, and is waiting for one hotel to call him back, it sounded promising!

I’ve got a feeling this summer will be hard too, with the strength of the lira weakening meaning prices in tourist resorts will increase, while wages most definitely will not.

Anyway, the time off work means Berkay has been spending a lot more time with Boncuk, and has been taking her for nice winter walks along the beach, he managed to get food for her on a ‘pay later’ promise, so she’s well fed and happy. She loves staying in the hotel and being free to roam around while its closed, we are unsure where she will be able to stay in Summer though. She’s due her yearly booster vaccinations now, so Berkay is trying to get that sorted too, luckily he has a friend who knows a vet, so no doubt they’ll be on a ‘pay later’ promise too. Getting into debt for Boncuk is worth it, of course. (:

This dog is Boncuk’s friend. It lives near the hotel and comes to the fence to say hello to her, Berkay let it into the hotel grounds today and let them have a little play off the lead together. Bless.
Berkay has also been spending a lot of time with friends, they often go fishing together hoping to catch some dinner! They are a lovely couple, we often went for BBQ’s together when I lived there, I have done a few posts involving them in the past. Their little boy, Çınar , is over a year old now, bless him. Berkay took this little monster dressing gown back for him from the UK after Christmas. Seeing how big he has got really makes me realise how much things are changing and how long I’ve been away. Sometimes it seems like just yesterday I lived there, sometimes it seems like forever.

2013 – A year in pictures – Part 2.

Posted on January 11, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

To carry on from part one, here are the rest of my favourite ‘moments’ of 2013 captured on camera.

July

July marked our 3 year anniversary, although it feels like we’ve been together so much longer. The first photo was taken on July 8th, our actual anniversary, and the second was taken a few days later when my Mum and aunt came to visit. This is one of my favourite photos of us ever.

The first is a photo of my aunt, me and mum during their holiday. I stayed at their apartment the whole week and it was great to spend time with them. Me and Berkay enjoyed making use of the pool again!

I don’t know why, but I really love this photo of me, I look so happy. This was after a freak summer rain storm and the clouds made for a pretty sunset. The second photo was taken after my family had gone home and me and Berkay had gone to the beach for a picnic. We were surrounded by half dressed tourists sunbathing and we rocked up fully clothed with our pots, pans and plates.

The height of summer was tough for Boncuk too, she was far too hot and enjoyed ice-lollies every once in a while to cool her down, such a spoilt little doggy. The photo on the right was taken during one of our long walks where we let Boncuk run off the lead and have some fun with her ball, she was more interested in giving us hugs though.

August

The little fella on the left was my little buddy. Whenever I was alone in our house at night when Berkay was at work, he’d come out and I’d see him running across the walls, he even slept in my shoe once. He was a little scary, but quite cute, too. The photo on the right is me with our friends little boy who was 10 months old at the time, we quite regularly went on barbeque picnics with them at little bays around Fethiye.

These two photos were taken in Dalyan when me and Berkay had a rare day out. I’d always wanted to go and when we decided I was moving back to the UK, we thought we best make the most of our last few weeks together. The lake was so calm before the rush of tourist boats arrived. It was beautiful. I had some fun in the mud bath, Berkay wasn’t brave enough to cope with the smell and jump in though!

Look how tanned we are in these photos! Both photos taken during one of our daily dog walks. I miss just spending time walking with them both.

Whenever we’d sit down for a rest during the walk, Boncuk would come straight over and jump on us for a cuddle. Soppy little thing ❤

September

September was tough. These photos were all taken before I returned to the UK. We took photos at every opportunity when we realised our time was running out together. They were all taken during our daily walk with Boncuk. We’d go up to the top of the hill and sit down and look over Calis and our house. Boncuk would play with her ball and come and give us hugs and it was so lovely to get away from the busy tourist areas or the noisy roads. It was our special place and it was so peaceful.

Sitting on our balcony playing this game ‘tri-ominos’ was another of our favourite things to do, such a simple thing, but something that I really do miss. The second photo is one of the last photos I have of the 3 of us and I love it to bits. This was a couple of days before I returned to England.

These two photos were taken during our little minibreak to Gumbet, Bodrum. They were the only 2 days Berkay had off during the whole of the summer and we wanted the time away together before I had to return to the UK. It was lovely to get away for a few days and forget that I would be leaving soon. The view from the rooftop terrace of our hotel was beautiful.

This is another of my favourite photos of myself, I was just so happy to be in Fethiye right at that moment. When I realised I was leaving I really did realise how much I took for granted about Fethiye and appreciated it so much more.

The photo on the left shows just how much Berkay and Boncuk love each other, a dog really is man’s best friend. The photo on the right is special too, one of the last walks we went on together and we just sat down on the beach watching the waves, even Boncuk looked like she was looking out to sea with deep thoughts going on in her head.

October

The best thing about coming back to the UK was being reunited with my 2 year old sister, Abbie. She’s just adorable and we’re really close. I love looking after her and we’re like best friends 🙂 The photos on the right are in a frame right above my bed. Dad put the frame there purposely so that all my most favourite memories could be above my head while I’m dreaming. ❤

October meant Halloween, and I spent ages carving this Peppa Pig pumpkin, I told myself it was for my sister but I got a lot of enjoyment out of it, I think it turned out pretty good for a first time effort! The second photo is my mums dog, although he’s not nearly as lovely as my Boncuk, he’s a good second best, and a real funny thing.

November

Only one photo needed for November, after weeks of planning, panicking and worry, Berkay got his visit visa to the UK so that we could spend Christmas together. It was such a relief.. Knowing when I would see him again made being apart just that little bit easier.

December

By far the happiest moment of December was this first photo. This was literally 2 minutes after Berkay had appeared through the Gatwick arrivals door on 16th Decemember, it was the first time I’d seen him since September 26th. The second photo was taken around Christmas.

The last two photos of 2013, taken in London a few days before the end of the year. I love how these photos turned out, how good does Berkay look standing next to Big Ben? Personally I think it’s proof he belongs in England! (;

2013 was a good year, lots of memories, good and bad. Here’s hoping 2014 will be full of the same.
I’ll keep my camera by my side at all times and do my best to capture all those precious moments.

2013 – A year in pictures – Part 1.

Posted on January 11, 2014 by livingtheturkishdream

The start of a new year always has us reminiscing about the previous one doesn’t it? I was looking back over all my Instagram photos of the year, and realised I had captured a lot of special moments. People are always commenting about how ‘snap-happy’ I am and that I take far too many photos of pointless, trivial things…but, if I’ve learnt anything this year it’s that sometimes those pointless trivial things mean the most.
It was hard to narrow it down to just a few photos for each month, but here are my favourite moment-capturing photos of 2013.

January

How cute and smiley does our little Boncuk look here? Such a happy puppy, and she was so tiny back then. I love the photo of us purely because of how cold we look- notice my hoodie and coat.. It was freezing.

Love both of these photos as it reminds me how quiet and peaceful Calis Beach is during winter when no tourists are around..lovely calm seas and beautiful sunsets.

February

Two stunning photos of the beach. The first is my favourite, winter is definitely the best time for beautiful sunsets in Calis.

This was the view from my balcony on a very cold winter morning, just look at that snow on the mountain, when Babadağ gets snowy, you know it really is cold. The photo of Boncuk makes me smile, I love her flappy ears. Can’t believe how much she has grown.

March

The first photo was during a Fethiyespor game, we got free tickets and really enjoyed it, and the team won too! Look at the beautiful backdrop of mountains, it was such a beautiful place to watch a game of football, the first real hot day of the year too, and I got a totally sunburnt face. The second photo was from a really lovely Spring day, we went to the beach and had a little picnic, then went for long walk and on the way back home bumped into these gorgeous baby goats who belonged to my landlord. Being a big animal lover, I couldn’t resist picking one up for a hug!

These last two photos are sad, as they were from one of the last times I saw my rabbit, she died when I was in England in April. Poor little bunny<3

April

We both visited England for a month in April. These two photos were taken on my 21st birthday (as if the hat didn’t give it away), we celebrated with all my family and a few close friends. My cake was lovely and had photos of all my loved ones around the sides.
The first photo makes me laugh so much, me & Berkay took my little brother and sister to London Zoo, and as you can tell, Berkay was less than impressed by the pigs. Classic photo. The other is me and my sister just after her 2nd birthday, no wonder saying bye to her everytime I returned to Turkey was always hard, look how adorable she is!

May

Our two good friends got married in April but had their wedding party in May, it was my first time attending a Turkish wedding, it was interesting to say the least, but the bride looked beautiful. The second photo is one of my favourite photos of us, look at those smiles and happy eyes.

I love how happy Boncuk looks playing with her ball here, bouncing along after a long walk and a swim in the sea.

These photos are what I mean by ‘everyday trivial things’. Both taken on my balcony, the first is the beautiful view I had when I would sit outside at 5am watching the sun rise, the silhouette of the mountain.. just stunning. The second is one of the things I really miss the most, just sitting on the balcony having a barbeque. We used to have at least one a week, often more. Such a simple thing, but something that I really, really miss just doing together with Berkay.

June

Lots of happy moments in June. The first photo is just one of those moments that always makes me smile, it’s my little dog chasing two huge camels.. bless her, she likes to act hard but when the camel turned around to look at her she came running back to us. The second is from a lovely day when we had breakfast along the seafront in Fethiye town. It was an open buffet with everything you could ever want as part of a Turkish breakfast, it was delicious and the glass of cay finished it off nicely. What better place to have breakfast, so close to the sea and beautiful scenery.

These two photos were taken during a Sunday picnic with our friends at a quiet bay in Fethiye. We had a barbeque picnic and a lovely swim..the view on the way back to Fethiye town was stunning.

One of the reasons we have lots of lovely memories from June is because my Nan and Grandad came to visit. I spent a lot of time at their apartment with them and made full use of the pool and aircon, luxuries that we didn’t have at our house. I love the first photo of us all on their last night in one of our favourite restaurants in Calis, look at all those smiling faces.

While my grandparents were here we visited Yakapark (left) and Oludeniz (right). We have some lovely photos there, but these two of me and Berkay are my favourite.

Click here for part 2, July – December.

A Turkish wedding..

Posted on October 24, 2013 by livingtheturkishdream

Turkish weddings are spectacular occasions, I’m pretty certain they invite every person they’ve ever met, literally, hundreds, even a thousand people all gathered together to celebrate, the Turks do know how to throw a party.

The wedding celebrations go on for days, and it’s not unusual for the legal wedding ceremony to take place months before the actual wedding party, the equivalent of what we would call the ‘reception’. This was the case for our friends. They were legally married in April this year, and had a very small family get together in a restaurant. They held the actual wedding party, and everything else that goes with it, a month later at the end of May. I have their permission to share their photos so thought I’d do a post sharing my experience of a Turkish wedding.

The days and weeks leading up to the big wedding party were spent planning, we went to their house often and each time they were doing something wedding-related. On on particular occasion, they came in with a massive box of invitations to send out, ”how many people are they inviting?!” I asked, ‘not too many, just 500”….

500 people, and that is considered a fairly small wedding by Turkish standards! I don’t even know 50 people, let alone 500. The wedding party was taken very seriously, the groom’s father spent an awful lot of money on it, with the help of credit cards!

The night before the wedding, they had a henna night, I’ve heard this is normally a women-only thing, but both bride and groom attended in this case.

The next morning, the day of the wedding party, Berkay headed off to our friends village where they had sacrificed a cow and were serving up traditional Turkish meals to everyone who happened to be passing by. There was a steady flow of hundreds of people throughout the day, all coming to eat the food being offered as part of the celebrations. This carried on until late afternoon when it was time to get ready for the big party..

Typically, wedding parties are held in the late evenings, and can go on until the early hours of the morning. They are often held in large halls, ‘wedding salons’ or school yards. In this case, it was the school yard directly opposite their house. It seems so bizarre to me to hold a party in a school playground, when we think of traditional British wedding receptions, they are held in fancy halls or venues, all beautifully decorated tables and chairs, balloons, seating plans, perhaps a buffet or meal, and plenty of alcohol flowing. This was not the case here at all. Everyone was sitting on plastic garden chairs, hired from the local council, there was no food, no alcohol, not many decorations. It was all very simple, yet completely bonkers at the same time. We arrived at 8 o clock, just in time to see the bride and groom’s extravagant-looking car speeding through the village beeping its horn loudy to let everyone know there’s a wedding going on. The bride and groom’s names were written on the banner draped over the car, and it was covered in streamers and huge ribbons, I wish I had taken a photo!

After greeting the bride and groom’s parents, we found a couple of spare chairs and sat down, completely overwhelmed by the amount of people and the noise of the drums, something that is ever-present at Turkish weddings.

The bride and grooms close family and friends stood up and lit some sparklers, held them in the air and formed a little walkthrough archway with their arms, the bride and groom arrived and walked hand in hand through them, it all looked quite romantic with the sparklers! They walked straight into the middle of the yard and stood opposite each other, the bride had a veil over her head and a red ribbon tied around her waist, this is a ‘maidenhood belt’ or bekaret kuşağı which is tied around her by her family before leaving for the wedding. The groom said a prayer and removed his bride’s veil, revealing her face. Small fireworks were lit in the background and they then had their first dance, a typical slow dance, and then other couples started to join in.

After the first dance, the real party begins. Loud drums, all kinds of musical instruments, live music and singing and A LOT of dancing. The dancing goes on all night and is crazy, traditional Turkish dancing. The wedding we were at had only Turkish music, but many are more modern and include western music, I can’t count the number of times I heard wedding parties in the school yard behind my house playing gangnam style last year!

After a while, it was time to bring out the cake. The cake was HUGE, 7 tiers (yet still nowhere near enough to go around all the guests) and had yet more fireworks lit on top. The bride and groom placed some lira notes on the cake and it was cut up and distributed to guests, we didn’t stay around long enough to get any, unfortunately, as Berkay had to get to work!

Just before we went, the dancing was put on hold for a while and the bride and groom stood at the front of the seating area with ribbons draped around their shoulders. Guests are expected to pin money or gold coins to the ribbon, instead of giving presents. This was one of my favourite parts, I think it’s a good idea and a nice little tradition that looks great on the photos! We were near the front of the queue to pin money on, right after the groom’s family. Each person that pinned money on got a photo taken with the bride and groom and then went back to their dancing.

We had to go home after this as Berkay had work, but I’m certain the wedding carried on until the early hours with plenty more fun and dancing.

It was very different to any wedding I have ever been to before, but it was an experience to say the least. If we ever get married, I’m sure we’ll incorporate elements of both traditional British and Turkish weddings, or maybe we’ll do as many of my friends have and have two, they are very different after all. (: